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Most people would define optimism as being endlessly happy, with a glass that’s perpetually half full. 大多数人将乐观定义为永远快乐,总觉得杯子里的水还有一半。But that’s exactly the kind of false cheerfulness that positive psychologists wouldn’t recommend. 但积极心理学家并不提倡这种虚假的快乐。“Healthy optimism means being in touch with reality,” says Tal Ben-Shahar, a Harvard professor.“健康的乐观是与现实联系在一起的,”哈佛大学教授泰·本-沙哈说道。According to Ben-Shahar, realistic optimists are those who make the best of things that happen, but not those who believe everything happens for the best.根据他的观点,现实的乐观主义者是去积极实现事情的圆满,而不是坐等事情会自己圆满。
Ben-Shahar uses three optimistic exercises. 本-沙哈提出了乐观训练的三个阶段。When he feels down—say, after giving a bad lecture---he grants himself permission to be human.当他心情低落时——比如,一个糟糕的演讲之后——他宽慰自己这是人之常情。He reminds himself that not every lecture can be a Nobel winner, some will be less effective than others. 他提醒自己不是每一次演讲都要求诺贝尔标准,有些演讲的效果会不如其他。Next is reconstruction. 下一个阶段是重塑。He analyzes the weak lecture, learning lessons for the future about what works and what doesn’t. 他会分析这次失败的演讲,哪些地方可取,哪些不可取,为将来的演讲积累经验。Finally, there is perspective, which involves acknowledging that in the grand scheme of life, one lecture really doesn’t matter.最后一个阶段是前瞻,我们要认识到在生命的宏伟蓝图中,一次演讲根本算不上什么。
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